Christian Dating Advice For Men
Christian Dating Advice For Men
by Joseph Matthews
Balancing our beliefs and desires is an ever acting
characteristic in a humans life, we strive do this all the
time.
We all struggle as men with our faith and urges; however, we
can learn how to fit these two qualities together, by
learning new perspectives.
Naturally, we strive to remain true in our beliefs. For some
Christian men, it is vital that their experience of love
stay within the boundaries of their church.
Sex during marriage only is one of those boundaries.
I don't judge this tenant. Some people choose to follow it.
I believe this is just as valid as the people who choose
not to follow it.
Ancient cultures used to believe that when partaking in sex,
a part of the other person's soul would mingle with yours,
and that you'd carry that person around with you for the
rest of your life.
In some respects, this is true. So the doctrine to keep
your virginity for your wife is a wise one.
This can present a challenge for men who strive to remain
strong in their faith.
There are a few perspectives to consider when you wish to
continue attracting women and then foster your relationship
while awaiting the consummation of marriage.
After all - sex is important! Getting married to someone
who's sexually incompatible with you can be a very difficult
union to be in.
Here is some advice I've come up with specifically for men
who face this issue of romance vs. faith.
1. Refine your beliefs
Faith guides us throughout our lifetime, is essential that
you are clear in where you place your faith and beliefs.
We all have free will, the ability to think and reason, this
is God's gift to us. We look at all our options while
deciding which path we each take. Some of us take it all in
and keep what teaching reverberates within our higher self,
while others embrace all of their churches teachings.
You must refine and clarify your beliefs and then stick to
them, no matter your choices.
2. Understand that God has a plan for you.
You must trust in the fact that there is a woman out there
you are meant to be with, and God has a plan to unite you
with her.
But there is only so much God can do! After all, we are
beings of free will, and it is up to us to take action and
seize the opportunities God presents to us.
That means we must be proactive in finding the right woman
for us.
Since your actions are belief based on the path God that has
set before you, you have to make it happen. This means going
out to meet women, dating and getting to know the woman.
Remember this is not something that just happens.
3. Understand that virginity is not mysterious or
essential.
Sex is simply an act, whether virginity is in question or
not. It comes naturally as does walking, talking and
breathing. We do these things.
God meant for man to be fruitful and multiply. We are meant
to have sex. It is one of God's greatest gifts. If we were
not meant to have sex, He would not have made it
pleasurable.
Virginity may be sacred, however, it is meant to be given or
lost. Your challenge is to seek out the right person with
whom to share your sexuality.
Sex of course is an aspect of spirituality. It is one in
which you find the person who makes you feel alive, loved
and completed. This is distinct from the sexual act, since
it vibrates within a higher level of your soul.
It is this type of intimacy you should strive to achieve
before marriage, because this will help you to know if the
physical aspect will be in tune as well.
Kissing, touching and hugging are natural and nothing to
fear. However, sharing your dreams and hopes while gazing
deeply into her eyes and relating to her internal desires is
where intimacy stems and thrives.
4. Look at women as real people, and do not put them on a
pedestal.
When you place too much importance on blending sex and
faith, you may find yourself inflating the importance of a
woman.
Perhaps you consider her a goddess, a delicate flower,
something you should cherish and treat special.
Keep in mind, there isn't much difference in men and women,
since we are all cut from the same cloth. Treating a woman
special because of a sexual attraction is not the same as
respect.
It is easy to love an ideal. But it is hard to love the
reality. The woman who gets awnry when she's hungry, the
woman who nags you about taking out the garbage, the woman
who wakes up in the morning with bad breath - that is the
reality.
We have to learn to love the reality of women, and not
idealize them. Realize that sex is just one aspect to the
females of our species. And that being human, we all share
similar traits.
When we see girls as people, just like us, we are able to
get a clearer picture of whether or not we are meant to be
with them.
About the Author:
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